So I had started walking the block to help my contractions continue and not stop. At that point I was having contractions every three minutes, usually the process starts at ten plus minutes and slowly increases to a contraction every minute when you really are in active labor. So it already was starting off a little strangely. These contractions were very doable, yet during each one, I had to stop. As I had practiced in my Bradley Method classes, I would lean against my husband, Justin, and relieve some of the pressure by moving my hips back and forth. I'd slowly walk a few more minutes and then stop again. We walked around for about an hour that way and then decided to walk back to our home. After an hour and half I started feeling a little more uncomfortable, and very nauseous. Yes, I threw up. Luckily I had a bowl right next to me...no mess!
I felt better after that and decided to try a few of the different laboring poses. The first I tried was side-lying on the bed, which we had practiced all through pregnancy in a really relaxing state. Nope! Made the pain worse! I then tried sitting backwards on a chair. Horrible! Tried sitting on the toilet. Blah. Tried on the ground kneeling against the couch. This one helped for about five minutes, then my legs were going numb which ruined it for me. The only position that was bearable was standing and leaning against the wall, swaying my hips. It was obvious right away, I wasn't going to be sitting down. The weirdest thing that I did I thought I would never do. Make small moaning sounds. It helped so much, as did focusing on each individual contraction, one at a time. Justin kept trying to be a good husband and have me eat some bites of a protein bar, I tried once, didn't want to eat anything. So I just made sure to keep drinking liquids.
By 5 p.m., Justin called the birthing center. We were really confused with my three-minute-apart contractions. I wasn't having the long one-minute contractions that usually come with it, but they had never been spread out. The question they ask to make sure you are getting into active labor, "Is she laughing and talkative?" If not, you know she's getting there. When he looked at me after being asked this, I just gave him a look, I was not comfortable.
After the fact, Justin told me that he was surprised how 'happy' and myself I
was -- all things considered -- and he thought that was a good trait to have; that I
didn't become a crazy, evil laboring woman!
The midwife at the birthing center said keep laboring at home and call back if anything changes. Around 6 we called back. I was definitely feeling the need to put all my focus into each contraction. My contractions were still consistently coming every three or less minutes, but only lasting about thirty seconds each time. Finally we got the okay that our midwife would meet us at the birthing center. I had dreaded the car ride, but it was surprisingly fast and not painful. First off it was a miracle that there was no traffic at 6 on the I-5 freeway, and second, when you introduce your laboring body to a new environment, i.e., the car, your contractions lessen.
When we got to the birthing center, I wobbled in and my midwife decided to check my dilation then, since if I wasn't dilated a lot, I would have to go home and then come back. Luckily, I was already six centimeters dilated, and had been in labor for about five hours. I was encouraged, thinking that was good progress. Laying down for the vaginal exam was PAINFUL though, since I still only wanted to stand.
After that, my best friend Marissa arrived. She was there to be my doula. A doula assists a woman in labor with pretty much whatever she needs to keep her comfortable. I wouldn't have wanted anyone other then Marissa, I trust her completely. Switching between her and my husband, I would lean on them for support as each contraction came. The midwife had seen my birth plan and knew I was wanting to try the hot tub for labor relief. As she made up the water, it looked so inviting. By then my shorts had already been off from getting wet with some kind of labor issue (don't really remember why...), so I threw off my top and jumped in. The tub was so relaxing that my contractions
I labored in the bath from around seven-thirty to ten-thirty. It is crazy how the time really just flies by as your mind is completely focused in each moment, one contraction at a time.
At around eight o'clock, this is how it was:
Me: "Justin, I feel another one coming on."
Justin: "Alright, you got this one. Remember to keep breathing."
*grab his hands tighter*
Justin:"Try not to tense, let the contraction just move through you."
Me: "Okay" (moaning in the most attractive way I could.)
Contraction over. Marissa shoves the coconut water in my face, I suck up a few sips. Relax my body as much as I can, and wait for the next one.
Me: "This isn't so bad, I can totally do this! Contractions aren't that bad, my period cramps were worse, I even get breaks in between these pains!"
Around 10:30 this is how things had progressed:
Me: "Justin, I ALREADY feel another one coming on. I don't want another one. They are coming too soon." I am tensing my body even though trying not to.
Justin: "Don't squeeze my hand so hard, You need to relax and just breath through the--"
Me: "I CAN'T NOT SQUEEZE, OK?! (I am moaning a little more deep and guttural,which is helping get me through the contraction).
Justin: "See it's over already!"
Me: "Yeah!...No. No it's not! It's double peaking!!! I hate this... When will it just be over?"
As you can see, around ten-thirty I had started to get into the transition phase. This is when you're finally going to get that last few centimeters left of dilation done, and then you can push. Most women say its the hardest part, and I really agree. A huge issue is you begin to self-doubt your ability to go on, and not knowing when transition will be over is really hard to bear. Justin had been keeping track on a phone app of all my contraction times. He stopped keeping track then since they were pretty regular now: Start. Minute thirty. End. Thirty second break. Start. Minute fifteen. End. Start right away again. Minute twenty. End. Thirty seconds break, etc. All of the fast contractions made me nauseous and I threw up for the third time, which was pretty much a dry heave since I hadn't eaten since lunch. When you aren't getting enough breather-breaks, it's really hard to mentally recharge for the next contraction. This is also when women who have lasted this long without an epidural start screaming to the doctor to give them one right away. If I hadn't had Justin there to motivate and encourage me to get through it, reminding me that baby was on the way, I don't think I could have done it.
By 10:45 p.m., the midwife had come in to check on me. She could tell by the lack of me talking and my low moans that I had to be almost to the pushing stage. I think it's so amazing how midwives can observe the tone change of the mamas and know what's going on in their bodies. It was around eleven-fifteen when I was questioning the desire to start pushing.
One of my biggest fears (I mentioned in a previous post) was tearing. I had repeatedly told my midwife that I wanted her expertise on whatever I needed to do to not tear when I started pushing. Her recommendation was she was going to help open my perineum and use a warm compress to gently soften the skin more so there would be enough room for the head to come out. In doing so she told me I couldn't have a water birth, since she couldn't see and help with my perineum. This was not a disappointment because I had not made up my mind in my birth plan if I wanted a water birth or not, the water had just been amazing to labor in.
When I shakily got out of the water, she let me get through a contraction standing, which wasn't comfortable AT ALL after having the soothing water, then she checked to see how dilated I was. Nine and a half! So close. I could semi-see the light at the end of the tunnel. She told me I should try and go pee on the toilet. Contractions are made worse when you have a full bladder, since your bladder expands when full and creates less room for your body to be working in dilating and having baby descend. Right after I peed, I was like, "Oh goodness. I NEED to push"! No question about it, my body was saying PUSH. I had always heard you will know when it's really time to push, and I knew. Everything in my body was saying Push. Right. Now....
And that leads us into the next post which will be My Natural Labor Story: Stage Two: pushing that baby out!
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